Yeah, I guess y’all know now where Crook’s Eye View stands.
My Moniker
That’s right! It is that time once again. Russ is up to one thing or another. And, a man after my own heart, his dream is prophetic! Enjoy this episode of “Russ”!
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Not Far
Yeah, this, for me, is really not far from the truth. I was once told as a child – around six years old – that my smart mouth would eventually, one day, get my ass kicked for me. Well, honestly, that has yet to happen. So, I have never put much stock in what anyone says to me out of spite.
The short version of my run-in with the “ass kicked” proclaimer: A cold morning at Friendsville Elementary, the playground. A seventh grader (as I said I was six – so, me, second grade or so), a guy named Chris (I think that was his name) but everyone (no lie) called him Booger, said to me, “Hey, shorty, what are you doin’? Man, you are short!”. Well, yeah, I’m six feet tall now, but then, comparitively, I was much shorter than him! So, I responded, “Not much, totem pole. What are you doing?” This was the point he proceeded to make his assumption that my smart alec mouth would get me into trouble one day. And, as I said, that has yet to happen. If anything, it has greatly enriched my life.
At any rate, all that being said, here is the latest “Russ” cartoon. It is not in color, as the rest that will follow periodically may also not be in color. Enjoy this episode of “Russ” called “Bus”.
Evil!
So, the Vatican is at it’s subtly evil best, yet again. A nine year old Brazilian apparently had an abortion and was excommunicated by the church. She was raped by her father, got pregnant, had an abortion and was abandoned by “God’s people”. God? A question for You: do You realize what example Your followers are setting for the world? Just curious. (Nothing was done to the father, by the way.)
It Is That Time Again!
As the race for the American presidency continues with the myriad of television ads and rallies and primaries, it is time once again for Mr. Dollar’s latest press conference. Do or die or dollar, he will be elected!
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Spinning Out Christmas In May!
I was feeling a bit creative this morning, so I have made a new cartoon that may be a series. We will just have to see where it goes, if it goes at all. Anyway, this guy makes a reference to Christmas; hence, the title of this post. It is just a short cartoon, so . . . enjoy!
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A Special Day
Hearts and hugs to all the moms out there – past, present and future!
You know when everything is going wrong, the chips are way down or gone all together, you can always come home to mom. And the comfort and understanding will give you shelter from any storm.
Happy Mother’s Day!
This song is dedicated to my mom. It’s probably the earliest memory of music I have and it’s stuck with me. Thanks, mom!
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On This Day In History – May 8th! (A Quick Resurrection)
What very well may have happened on May 8th, through the ages:
81 A.D. – Wang Chong writes and finishes his work Lùnhéng or “Critical Essays” where he describes accounts of using the square-pallet chain pump in irrigation in China. He also describes his use of “the funky flower” smoked in the first official bong, and he and several concubines have a huge party, where he coins the phrase “Everybody Wang Chong tonight!”
220 A.D. – The first hot air balloon rises over China. The pilot, Whatzu Chang, decides that the hilarity of dropping goat bladders filled with his own urine onto unsuspecting heads is too much to pass up. Chang is deemed the title “Bladder Bomber” and his tag line is “Piss me off and be pissed on!”
1202 A.D. – In a Poetic Edda by Vilhelm Ekelund, it is discovered that, after Goddess Freyja’s romp with four dwarves in the sack, where she traded sex for a necklace, the first official cigarette was rolled. Freyja, having taken a drag, says, “You little guys pack quite a punch!” One dwarf responds, “Yes, Snow White said the same thing, didn’t she, Grumpy?” Grumpy responds, “Piss off, Quicky! You aren’t one for longevity, and me and the gang are this close to kicking you out of the group!”
1864 A.D. - The epic city of El Dorado is finally found by two unknown explorers at the mouth of a previously unexplored branch of the Amazon River. Humphrey Dilly and Magnus Comloude finds the golden city along with little green men operating a landing pad for space ships the size of cities. Dilly has an anxiety attack, upon which time the little green man that appears to be the leader gives Dilly and Comloude a choice. Telepathically, “Greetings! Welcome to our fair golden city. You may take this blue pill and stay for the mega-party that’s about to happen, and see how deep this rabbit hole goes (her name is Gertrude, by the way . . .) or take this red pill and you’ll forget you ever saw us.” Dilly takes the red pill and immediately explodes by spontaneous combustion. Comloude takes the blue pill and, after the party, makes his way back to civilization at which point he tells his story and is immediately institutionalized.
1986 A.D. - A music group produces their one and only hit record and coins a new phrase.
2012 A.D. - The self-proclaimed “Strange One” (in agreement with everyone at the local bar) resurrects his formerly glorious post “On This Day In History.” Hope you enjoyed it!
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A Real B*tch!
So, I met a girl at the bar I go to. A really sweet girl. She has a three year old child that she’s so proud of, and works at a local restaurant – Stir Fry Cafe. Well, she told me about her and her friend’s episode the other night at a concert. The following story is loosely based on their experience. This really happened to them, and all I could tell her empathetically is that Karma is a bitch and that guy will definitely answer for what he did to them both at the concert. Enjoy the story.
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The Flower Series
I’ve been doing a series of paintings called the 8″ x 10″ Emotional Flower Series and finally got around to finishing this one. I’ll be eventually posting it to Gallery Three, but wanted to go ahead and post it to the blog. I like it a lot, turned out really well, I think. It’s called “Calm”. Check it out! It really “pops” in my opinion.
"Calm" - 8" x 10" Acrylic on canvas board
